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25 January 2010
i, my name is Adrian Smithson. I'm here to talk to you about a very serious condition: Critically Radically Acute Muscle Obsession (CRAMO).
CRAMO affects one in every 1.4 men* and the number is constantly growing. The major symptoms of this heartbreaking condition include frequently surfing the Net for muscle porn, and going to the gym-- not to actually work out, but so you can stalk muscular guys who are working out. Other possible indicators of this debilitating disorder include (but are not limited to) changing one's course while driving, just so you can cruise by a hunk on the sidewalk again; taking your lunch break at the same time of some muscledude you saw at the park in hopes of seeing him there again; Watching WWE wrestling just to see John Cena.
I used to have CRAMO, and believe me, it's not fun. I used to jerk off two-- maybe three-- times a day while fantasizing about musclemen.
But then I found CRAMO Anonymous (CA). CA was fantastic. The other CRAMO sufferers were men who could identify with my condition. They welcomed me into the group with open arms (and-- open zippers, I soon found out. Seems the other guys were attracted to my impossibly huge guns, as well as my traps, pecs and legs.).
Yeah, my CA group was fantastic. Good times. Good times.
So, anyway, if you are addicted to big muscle, check out CA. Maybe you'll find someone there who will flex his arms for you, like I did for them (and more).
*How they can split people into tenths, I don't know. Just trust me on this.
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I had a HARD time reading about CRAMO since my eyes kept drifting over to look at that big hard man at the right!!! Oh I so have cramo |
"I can't believe how awesome your site is! (...to end a sentence with a preposition.) I think you should be nominated for some kind of Nobel Peace Prize, or a Pulitzer or something. Is there a Pulitzer for gay erotica? Well, there should be. I'm going to write my Congressman and see if he can't do something about it. Seanny, you should have a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. You should have an airport named after you. Your writing is so graphic-- so sensual-- so descriptive! It's just awesome! If you were ever to publish a novel, I'd buy TEN copies and hand them out on street corners! I LOVE YOU SEANNY! I ABSOLUTELY LOVE YOU!"
– Some person whose name I didn't get
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